Wish
by Eien Blue
Summary: COMPLETE"Rin's Birthday wish has always been the same. But on her eighteenth birthday, she finally decides to do something to make it come true.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Inuyasha or any of its characters.

**R ** for mild sexual content, mature subjects and bad language.

OK minna-san this is my first attempt at Inuyasha Fiction so please be gentle. I'd love to hear your comment and advice. Enjoy

I would like to thank **Flamingo8564** for her wonderful and speedy beta work

**Wish**

She looked out the window, the air was warn, the sky was blue and there weren't any beings alive that could cause her harm. Her quarters overlooked the west valley, and from here she could see as far as the ocean on the other side of the land. All this should give her comfort, should make her happy. But today on her eighteenth birthday, she felt nothing but the sadness and loneliness that plagued her ever since she came to terms with her feelings for him.

She held on to her old rag doll and looked up to the sky whishing for the millionth time that she was a Youkai. That had been her birthday wish ever since she could remember, but like the rest of her wishes, it was never to come true. She looked out on the valley remembering the morning incident. He always told her not to wander alone, to always take one of the servants with her, but today, for the first time, she had disobeyed the one she loves... _Would you even care if anything happens to me? _She smiled bitterly knowing the answer to that question. She closed her eyes, and again thought of that old fortuneteller and her words of hope.

_**Flashback**_

"_I will pick so many berries and make a huge birthday cake!" she smiled as she picked the red fruits, her first stop had been the river, eying the fish she caught and the flowers she picked she smiled satisfied, later she would prepare a feast, put the flowers on a vase, set them on the table and sing the sweet song Kagome-san taught her... how did it go?_

"_Happy birthday to you... happy birthday to you._

_Happy birthday dear Rin... happy birthday to you"_

_Another bitter smile, Jaken-sama wouldn't sing it with her... and he... wouldn't even be there... he never was. Suddenly the hopelessness and loneliness were too overwhelming for her. She looked at all the things she gathered disgusted. Who was she fooling, who was she pretending to be? Year after year was the same, only to end up on her bed crying and whishing she was never brought back to life by the one, the only one she's ever loved. She dropped everything and ran as fast as she could, where? She didn't know, but she would run away and never come back... would he even notice? She ran and ran deep into the forest, where it was forbidden for her to go, even with servants. _

_She stopped once her legs felt as if hey would explode; when they could not hold air any longer, thirst and exhaustion pulsing ever so mercilessly throughout her being. She looked around and didn't recognize the area...didn't matter... soon it will be nightfall and she will fall victim to some starving Youkai. Sitting against a tree trunk she finally couldn't take it anymore and let it all out. She cried and cried not caring who was around to hear it, to see it, to see her misery as it finally came out to claim her_

"_Why are you crying child?" a voice asked her. She lifted her head from her knees and stared into the face of a very old woman. "Are you hurt?" Rin shook her head no. The wounds she had were not the ones that could be cured with medicine or potions._

"_Then you shouldn't be around these parts. Youkai here are not forgiving, and a tender prey as yourself would only call to them."_

"_I-I don't care." Rin responded hopelessly "let them come and eat me... I'm ready to die."_

"_Ready to die... why would such a young flower wish for death?" the woman asked setting her basket down and kneeling by her. "Are you that much in pain... are you that much out of faith that you would rather end it cowardly than to fight for what you want?" the woman brought a wrinkled hand to her face. Rin recoiled instinctively, the only one she ever allowed to set hand on her was him... although he seldom if ever did... the woman smiled warmly ignoring her rude action._

"_What is it that your heart desires my child?"_

"_I-I..." she shook her head not knowing the answer to that question._

"_Are you sure you do not?"_

"_I- I am in love with a man, but he doesn't love me back." Rin admitted bitterly, what did it matter if this stranger knew, in fact it made her feel better to say it out loud._

"_Are you sure? I see love in your life." the woman said surprising her._

"_He is a Youkai ... he doesn't like humans."_

"_HE likes you enough to keep you around."_

"_What do you know!?"_

"_You smell like Youkai, and I dare to say this Youkai is very powerful, for the animals and other monsters on this forest have not dared come close to you."_

"_Yes... he is powerful... the most powerful of them all." her eyes shined with love and pride as she said the words._

"_Then what is it that you want to please this Youkai and make him see your feelings?"_

"_I want to... become a Youkai"_

"_You do know what that means?" the woman responded after a long time._

"_Yes."_

"_And you still want to loose your humanity for one you do not know whether it will value your sacrifice?"_

"_Yes."_

"_They say Youkai cannot love."_

"_Yes they can... Sesshoumaru-sama's father had a son with a human... he even died protecting her, and this son lives with a human and have a young child together."_

"_Sesshoumaru ... Lord demon of the west?" Rin covered her mouth, Jaken-sama had told her never to say she lived with the Sesshoumaru-sama. Not only would it put her in danger, but it would make him loose respect among the other lords._

"_Forget what I said obaasan." she got up to get away from her, but was stopped by her hand on her shoulder._

"_There is a way you can become what you wish," she turned to the old lady in shock. "But it will be a hard quest."_

"_No matter what it takes... I must..." Rin responded as determined as ever._

_**End of Flashback**_

Rin held the doll tight remembering those words as if they were spoken just now... _there is a way... to become a Youkai... _

She walked to her small chest to collect the few belonging she had collected over the years. Not the lavish dresses of silk Sesshoumaru-sama's servant made for her, nor the golden jewels to adorn herself with. But the other most treasured things she had saved with all her heart. She opened the small box and looked at its contents... a strand of silver hair... she had gone through great troubles to get, a piece torn from his kimono in a fight... she had risked her life to get it as soon as she spotted it lying on the ground...a claw, Jaken-sama got it stuck in his arm when Sesshoumaru-sama had slap him for being insolent; and the only gift he's ever giving her, a small mirror. She could still hear his voice; still remember every word he uttered as he handed it to her...

"_Rin, keep this with you always; it will protect you when you no longer live here." _

"I will never leave you Sesshoumaru-sama." She had said, he only looked at her and left her room quietly, the way he always did. She had been a child then, but what she said then, she maintains now... she will never leave him. She will become a Youkai, and be by his side forever.

XXXX

"Jaken," Sesshoumaru made his way into the lavish dinning hall, "Where is Rin?"

"Ah Sesshoumaru-sama, the servants are looking for her as we speak." The green servant said barely above a whisper.

"Why would they have to look for her...Jaken?" The tone in which the question was asked scared the weaker Youkai.

"She never came back from her morning walk, Sesshoumaru-sama." The said Lord just hardened his stare a little, staring right into the scared face of Jaken for an interminable length of time.

"Why did she go out on her own?" He finally asked as tonelessly as always.

"She said it would be alright, she was only going as far as the river, I tried to persuade her to take servants but she wouldn't listen to me Sessho...."

"Jaken" Sesshoumaru snapped suddenly to make the smaller demon quiet.

"Hai Sesshoumaru –sama," replied Jaken as he raised his arm expecting to be smacked.

"If anything happens to her, I will kill you."

"Hai."

He looked at the sniveling demon, "Go, and don't come back until you find her," he bellowed raising his arm and pointing toward the door.

"Hai Sesshoumaru-dono."

XXXX

"To the east, across the river, through the forest and into the cave of the "Lost Miko" _That didn't sound that hard did it?_ Rin thought as she repeated the instructions the old woman gave her. It would have been much easier had she taken Arun with her, but that was impossible. Sesshoumaru-sama could feel him and find her in less than a heart beat. She smiled at the thought that "The Lord Youkai of the West" would actually look for her and not for the beast he'd have since childhood. Taking a deep breath she embarked in the hard quest ahead of her... To the cave of the Lost Miko, if she survived that far, her wish would surely come true... _"Take the very heart of the frozen beauty, boil it in the water from the stream that runs through the cave and drink it on the night of the full moon... Only then you can become a Youkai." _It didn't make much sense that something so simple could do the magic on her, but for Sesshoumaru-sama, anything was worth a try. Rin tightened the thick wool tunic she wore, fixed her bag of provisions onto her back, checked to make sure the small pouch with her treasures was securely tied to the sash of her kimono and began walking toward the east...towards her wish.

XXXX

He walked into her room, a room he has not been in very often, just a hand full of times that he could remember. Only when she took ill would he come into it and from a corner would watch the servants tend to her...his most valued possession. It's been a few hours since Jaken left in search of his child; a child that day-by-day bloomed into the most beautiful human he's ever beheld. He should have let her go a long time ago, should have left her for death that day long ago when those wolves attacked her. Tensseiga passed its test reviving the child, but he, Sesshoumaru, Lord Youkai of the western lands had not passed his own trial. He'd taken the child and cared for her as his own. It seemed harmless at the time, but if he would have followed his instincts, he would not have to worry about this obsessive infatuation, the desire this woman-child awakened in him every time he laid eyes on her form. Keeping away from her was becoming harder and harder. And today of all days, the day she always celebrates as her Birthday, or so she calls it, the day he tried to avoid being close to her at all costs, she disappears... _did you run away from me Rin?_ He walked to her dresser and ran his eyes among her things; he ran a claw softly along her hairbrush, picked up a bottle of perfume and let her flowery scent invade him. He then noticed one of her drawers to be open; he looked into it and it seemed as if something had being removed. He then went to her closet and rummaged through her clothes, nothing seemed to be missing; then again, he did not know how much garments the child possessed. Next he made his way to the bed in which she slept, sat down on it and looked out the window, her scent reached his nose and he closed his eyes and sighted, invoking an image of her... _Rin, where are you?_

XXXX

The first day had not been bad at all; she walked all day by the side of a road. The smell of Sesshoumaru still clinging on to her had kept the other Youkai away. Of course, she knew none of this and silently thanked the gods for taking care of her. The day turned into night and she needed to find a place to stay. She came upon a deserted village and the memories of that day, long ago, when the wolves attacked the village in which she lived flooded her mind. She closed her eyes and pushed the images out of her head. She could not afford to cower now, not after all she's gone through. Making her way into an abandoned house, she came upon a bed of hay and sat there staring at the moon... _did you notice I'm gone... do you even care? _She asked herself_ as_ a bitter little laugh escaped her. Then the day's ordeals and long journey claimed her body and exhaustion overtook her. Rin lay down on her bed of straw, momentarily missing the comfortable soft cushioned in which she slept; the fire that overnight was alighted to protect her form the cold. _No Rin, you can't think this way, what you're doing is for your own good, for his sake, for both of us... I love you Sesshoumaru... Sama_. Those were her last thoughts as sleep took over.

XXXX

Sesshoumaru felt a strange sensation, shooting right through his cold heart. Was that a bad omen, a good one? It could not be bad, for what he felt was warm and pure. _Was that you my child?_ He wondered as he looked out the window of her room. Night had already fallen and there was no sign of her. Jaken was not back yet, probably afraid of his wrath. He could not wait for the incompetent fool to bring her dead body for him to grieve upon. He rose and went out the window in search of the only one that could help him now. Although he dreaded having to ask him for favors, but he was running out of choices... and time. He let his mind wander and take him to the one place he swore to himself never to go to, for as long as they both lived.

X

His brother was already out of his shack waiting for him, sword in hand.

"Sesshoumaru!" his Hanyou brother snapped as hatefully as always. _Why had he decided to come?_ Too late, Inuyasha already saw him, so there was nothing but to get it over with.

"Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru said tonelessly, "I am not here to quarrel with you, I have come to ask for your help." Inuyasha stood there transfixed, not knowing what to say or do. A small white haired child came running out of the shack in which he lived with his human mate, and she cautious as ever came running after the creature, bow and arrow in hand.

"What's your game Sesshoumaru!?" Inuyasha yelled. The small child clung to his legs and Inuyasha, the distrustful Hanyou that he was tried to pry him away, As if **_This _**Sesshoumaru, would stoop as low as to hurt a helpless Hanyou child.

"No games... will you listen to what I have to say?" There was no time to play with his brother. He looked at the woman and she slightly tilted her head to indicate her approval. A servant took the child away and the three of them were left alone. "Your child looks very much like you." Sesshoumaru began, "how old is he now... four years old?"

"Five... what is it that you want? You didn't come for a family reunion... talk before I make you talk," said Inuyasha, taking a defensive stance.

"Inuyasha!" The woman whispered.

"He is right, it does not bother me, if I had time I would take his offer, but as it is I might be already too late." Sesshoumaru paused. "Rin, the child I reared as my own has disappeared, I do not know how, or when. I only know that she left for a walk this morning and has yet to come back."

"Oh my God... Rin-chan!" exclaimed the woman, coming a step closer to the elder sibling.

"And why would you think that she might have come here?" Inuyasha asked putting his sword down.

"I do not think she came to you. I know your... woman has disappeared in the past, and somehow you always manage to find her. Tell me how you do it." Both Inuyasha and the woman stared at him for a long while, what was going through their minds was hard to say. "I see I made a mistake in coming here. I apologize for inconveniencing you." The Lord Youkai turned to leave.

"Wait... Sesshoumaru, you didn't make a mistake," Inuyasha said hesitantly

"It must have taken a lot for you to come to us," the woman continued.

"I do not need your praise, just tell me if you can help me find my... child."

"I don't think you realize there is but one trick to it... I love Kagome, that's why I can find her when she gets lost." The words were not mocking, or malicious, just a fact.

Sesshoumaru looked to the horizon... how ironic that he would admit this to someone other than her... "I do love her," he said simply, letting a small laugh escape his lips as he heard the woman gasp.

"Then close your eyes and try feeling her." Inuyasha added mercifully not commenting on what he just said.

"Do you think I would come this far to humiliate myself if I hadn't tried everything I can think of?" stated Sesshoumaru, desperation in his tone.

"Then you don't love her."

"Inuyasha!" Again the woman exclaimed, "Don't listen to him Sesshoumaru, do you have some kind of link with her?"

Sesshoumaru looked at her not understanding. "Link?"

"Yes, a link, don't think Inuyasha is that talented. The only reason he can find me is because we forged a mental link," stated Kagome.

"I do not have such a thing with Rin," uttered Sesshoumaru.

"Nothing at all? You have been living together since she was young."

"I did gave her a magic mirror once," Sesshoumaru said pensive. "I have its twin, it allows me to see her if she hold hers and looks into it."

"But she has to hold it and look into it?" the woman Kagome asked.

"Yes."

"Do you know if she has it with her?"

"No, I did not ever tell her what the mirror was for," Sesshoumaru said regretfully.

"How do you expect her to use it then, genius!?" Inuyasha attacked.

"Inuyasha... You're not helping," Kagome said.

"She was not supposed to leave me!" Sesshoumaru suddenly yelled loosing his composure, it had been a mistake to come here; he composed himself and flew away from them without looking back.

"Sesshoumaru!!!" the woman yelled after him, but he didn't bother to respond, "We will be looking for Rin-chan!!!"

XXXX

The first rays of morning sun hit her face waking her from her dreamless slumber. Rin got up and readied herself to continue her journey; she had a light meal and embarked on her quest again. What would this new day bring? She followed the same road as the day before, walked about an hour and was very amazed that no one, not even birds and insects could be seen or felt. Suddenly a dense fog came out of nowhere; in second she couldn't see an inch ahead of her. She stood in place not moving a muscle, not wanting to call the attention of whatever caused the fog to appear. A foul odor filled her nostrils and she couldn't keep the coughing at bay. A cold slimy object brushed her side, she turned to try and see what it was, but the fog got denser Again the thing brushed her leg this time, she touched where it did and brought her hand to her nose, the stench that hit her sent her on another coughing fit, this time she couldn't keep the nausea away and threw up everything she ate that morning. Then a tentacle like thing wound itself around her waist and lifted her above the ground. Her screams stripped her throat raw, although she knew there was no use because no one could hear her. She was doomed, before her real journey even began. The unfairness of it got to her soul... _why, why?_ The fog dissipated and she was confronted with her captor. A mantis like Youkai and they were known to be vicious. This one must be very young otherwise she would already be dead. The thing roared and got ready to strike her dead. In a moments rage she felt, whether it was her desire to live or the irony of her situation, all these years of being pampered and protected by the one she loves and now, that she finally wants to do something for him, she couldn't even get past the first obstacle. She roared as loud as the creature and grabbed a tree branch, the Youkai shook her from side to side and she went flying with branch and all. She made a dash escape, braking into a dead run, but the creature was on her quickly and it grabbed her again, this time by the ankle, and lifted her into the air. Rin waved the branch she still held tightly, but it was no use, the blood rushed to her head clouding her vision. With one last roar the Youkai aimed for her chest and she closed her eyes waiting for the final strike that would bring her life to an end... it never came, instead she was hurled in to the air and fell hard on her back.

"Are you alright?" a voice asked. Rin opened her eyes to see a very young girl above her.

"Yes... I think so," Rin responded checking her sash for the pouch that held her treasures. It was there intact. She sighed and eased a little.

"That was quite a daring move you did back there." The girl continued checking to see if she had any broken bones. Rin got up and away from the girl quickly, Jaken- sama rule number one: Never trust anyone. No one does a favor for free.

"I have nothing of worth to steal." Rin said apprehensively.

"Feh! you're welcome." The girl said standing up seemingly offended. Rin felt like an ass, but said nothing. "I thought I was doing you a favor, I been after that Youkai for three days, I hurt it pretty bad yesterday, that's why it didn't have the strength to kill you right away... I should have let it have his way with you."

"I'm sorry," Rin muttered embarrassed, "I was taught never to trust anyone... I am Rin, thank you for saving my life."

"I can understand that, I was taught the same thing, and I was also taught to say thank you and you're welcome too," the girl smiled. "My name is Sango."

"Nice to meet you Sango. Why were you after that Youkai?" Rin asked curious to know why would such a young girl risk her life like that.

"Food, what else?" Sango answer, "What are you doing around these parts unarmed?"

"I'm looking for something," Rin answered abruptly. This girl didn't need to know her purpose.

"You look like you're lost. On top of that that, the kimono you're wearing is pretty fancy and expensive looking. Are you a run away Miko or something?"

"No nothing like that. I'm just looking for the cave of the "Lost Miko" to the east." Rin admitted.

"What?! Why would you be looking for that place?" Sango was surprised by this.

"I can't tell you, but would you tell me how to get there?"

"I don't see what you would have to do in such a place! No one, and I mean no one has made it out of there alive!"

"I need to make it there and come out alive." Rin smiled innocently. Sango looked at her for a long time and sighed in frustration.

"I don't know why but... My village is on the way to it. I will take you as far as that, and I'll tell you the rest of the way. After that you're on your own."

"Thank you Sango, I couldn't ask for more." Sango took her to her wagon and Rin stayed there until the young girl finished cleaning the Youkai and wrapped what they would take with them. After that they headed east toward Sango's village. About an hour into the journey Sango pushed her horse forward and hid the wagon as quickly and frantically as she could.

"What's the matter?" Rin asked scared. The look on Sango's face was not very comforting.

"There's a Youkai on his way here... and is a powerful one, we need to hide. I cannot fight against such powerful fiend."

"How do you know all this?"

"I'm in the business since I was three. How do you think I survived this long? Be quiet and hide." They both lay low waiting for this powerful Youkai to come and go, Sango had set a barrier around them, but as she kindly put it, this Youkai was no ordinary monster and if it was keen enough could still feel them and break through the barrier. Rin looked in the direction Sango was staring at; she could see the sweat drip down her face. She looked on amazed at the Youkai Sango was staring so intently at. It was none other than Sesshoumaru- Sama... _Are you looking for me Sesshoumaru-sama?_ No it can't be, he would never do such a thing

Rin hid even lower into the wagon to avoid being spotted. She didn't know whether he was mad, worried or simply annoyed. Either way he could not find her yet-- not before her wish come true.

XXXX

"Sesshoumaru-dono, still no sign of Rin," Jaken couldn't finish his sentence as he found himself grabbed by the throat by a very angry Lord of the western lands.

"I told you not to come back until you found her... Jaken." Sesshoumaru bared his claws and poison began coming from them, "Sess... Sesshoumaru-dono..." Jaken braced himself for the worst.

"Sesshoumaru-sama," A servant made his way in the room... Rin's room, "One of the slaves searching the area found this an hour ago, the servant held a piece of torn Kimono, it was most definitely from one of her kimonos. He threw Jaken against the wall forcefully and grabbed the slave instead. He seemed to be loosing his composure rather easily since he came back from his brother's place. He didn't care who noticed; he wanted Rin found. The anxiety was slowly tearing him apart. He had spent all night looking with no success. His scent should still cling to her and should protect her to certain degree, but still, there were those Youkai who did not care about other's possessions, and his enemies, which were many, would not hesitate to cause Rin harm. Whatever the case, he could not sense her nor pick up his or her scent, which meant she was far, very far.

"Where?" Sesshoumaru snapped.

"About twenty miles from here, near a deserted village, just outside your domain my Lord." Sesshoumaru let the servant fall and immediately flew out of the window to the place in question... _"She's got to be alright, she's got to"_

XXXX

They spent most of the day traveling, talking bout various meaningless things. Thankfully, Sango didn't ask about the cave anymore. They camped by night and ate from the very Youkai who'd bullied her that morning.

"We should be in my village tomorrow." Sango said after they ate their meal in silence.

"Really? Good. I'm happy you get to go home and see you're mother and fiancée for a little while before going out hunting," Rin answered, genuinely glad for her new friend. Sango had told her pretty much her whole life story while on the road. And she, Rin had tried to talk about her own as little as possible. She couldn't tell a Youkai hunter that she lived with one of the most powerful ones, and that this trip was so she could become a Youkai to be with him.

"Remember what I told you right?" asked Sango, changing the subject.

"Yes," answered Rin

"Do you still want to go to that cave?" Sango had avoided talking about the cave up to this point, hoping Rin would change her mind.

"Of course, I have to!" answered Rin with grave urgency.

"Why?" asked Sango, disbelief in her voice.

"I already told you! I can't tell you why so please don't ask me again. I'm really grateful for your help. You restored my faith in humanity, but I just can't--"

"Rin, that's alright. You don't have to give me your reasons. Whatever it is, I am sure is very important. I just can't stress enough how dangerous it is.'

"I know, believe me! You've stressed it enough! It is just a risk I have to take." Rin looked at Sango conveying all her feeling with her eyes.

"Fine, I won't feel guilty if something happens to you. In fact, when I die, I will look for you in the next life and mock you for being stupid!" Sango laughed.

"And I will certainly deserve it," Rin smiled back.

"You know you can stay at my village for as long as you like." Sango sighed and lay down by the fire.

"I know, and I thank you."

"Let's go to sleep." Sango told her pointing at the cover she had lent Rin.

"Shouldn't one of us stay awake to guard for Youkais?"

"Nah, I set a barrier. No Youkai can come close to us because they can't even see us... I know a spell or two. Sleep tight. We have a long day ahead of us."

"About powerful ones, like the one this morning?" Rin asked worried that Sesshoumaru-sama would find his way to her again.

"Well... let's just hope they stay away from these parts."

XXXX

Sesshoumaru made it to the place, where Rin's Kimono had been found, in an instant. There he saw carnage of limbs and Youkai flesh, and what it appeared to be the remains of a fight. There was also a lot of Youkai blood disrupting his senses, so he could not look for her scent. He saw another piece from her kimono, but nothing else. No human blood or remains. Sesshoumaru came closer to the remains of the Youkai to see if Rin... **_his_** Rin had been devoured by it. He made his way cautiously, afraid of what he might find. Thankfully, there were no remains of human flesh to be seen, in fact it very much looked as if this monster had been... cleaned for consumption. He turned round and round looking for something, anything that lead him to her. Nothing, there wasn't any clues that might tell him what happened to Rin or if she was ever here. She had to have been here, of that he had no doubts. Of what he was not sure of is the state in which she left.

He roared frustrated, howling to the winds the way he has not done since his father took a human as mate. The way he did when his half brother was born. Never has frustration gotten a hold of him this way.

He flew towards the east in search of Rin. Time was running out! If she was still alive, he could not, would not, allow any more of these... incidents to happen.

XXXX

They made it to Sango's village; Rin was surprised to find nothing more than a few shacks and a small shrine. All the townsman came to receive Sango, giving Rin strange looks.

"It's alright she's with me," the young Youkai hunter announced. "She'll stay the night and be on her way in the morning." Then they all came to her and invaded her with a thousand questions. like Where are you from? or Where did you get this expensive silk kimono? After the very hectic welcome they all helped carry the Youkai Sango had killed. It amazed her that they were all to share it. Then when all the food was gone Sango and the other young hunters would go out once again to hunt, It was fascinating. Rin had never been exposed to anything other than what Sesshoumaru-sama exposed her to. She was grateful for it too. If anything, this journey served as a learning experience for her to realize how terribly lucky she was.

After that, the whole village gathered at the center of it and celebrated with roast Youkai and freshly made sake. For the first time in her life Rin got drunk. It felt delicious. Finally, late that night she eased into the comfortable bed Sango made for her and slept. This time she had dreams, filled with happiness and Sesshoumaru-sama.

The next day early in the morning Rin stood with Sango a few miles from the village, she had a few provisions and a cape to shield her from the cold.

"I ask you once more to reconsider Rin," Sango said pleadingly. "I shouldn't care, but my conscience will not rest knowing I sent you to your death."

"You've done all you can to dissuade me. Your conscience can rest in peace." Rin hugged her friend and kissed both cheeks, "I will never forget your generosity Sango." The young girl hugged back and smiled.

"Follow straight down this path and you shall reach the cave. The barrier spell I cast on you should last until you reach there. After that, the evil energy will be too much for my weak powers to keep you safe. Take care and good luck; may you find what you're looking for," and with a last tight hug the two women went their separate ways

XXXX

After looking for Rin the whole day Sesshoumaru now stood in the middle of his castle's biggest and most lavish room; the room in which Rin celebrated her birthday. It now lay in shambles after he took his frustration out on the inanimate objects. Another day and night gone by and she was still out there somewhere in danger. It tore him up inside not knowing, not having control of the situation the way he always does.Jaken and more servants were out there looking for her; but he stayed in case she came back. Again, he made his way to her room and sat on the bed that now smelled more like him than anything else. The minutes ticked by, the hours came and went and his heart pained more and more as time passed. He prayed to her gods and every god he knew about and did not believe in. Finally, tired of waiting futilely he too went out to look for his love.

XXXX

Rin followed the road as Sango told her. Like her friend had said, she had no more encounters with Youkai, and, in fact, she saw many which made her laugh as they acted oblivious to her—as if she was not there at all. It took her the whole day to finally reach her destination. She knew as soon as she saw it. No one needed to tell her she was in the right place as she stood in front of the cave. Fog concentrated around the entrance... or was it evil aura. It didn't matter. She made it and soon she would be a Youkai and go back home and make Sesshoumaru-sama finally notice her.

Noises interrupted her thoughts; she looked around and could see red and green eyes hiding in the bushes. Sango's words came back to her... _my weak power will not be enough..._Shrieking laughter broke out from everywhere and Youkai came out to claim her as prey. Rin had no time to scream. All that mattered was get in the cave and do what she must.

Rin broke into a dead run towards the cave, but the Youkai were not far behind. They were playing with her. She knew, if they really wanted to, they would have torn her to shreds already. _"It's right there, right in front of my eyes!"_ she said to herself as she ran desperately to her goal, _"just a little further Rin," _she kept on with her encouragements even as she tripped and fell, scraping her knees and elbows. She could hear the obnoxious laughter of the monsters right on her heels. _"No, please just a little more, a little further and you can be with Sesshoumaru-sama, as a Youkai, forever"_ but as the thought made its way to her heart, she knew the end of her rope was near. Something jumped on her; the claws tearing at her clothes and skin.

"Are you done running little girl?" The ugly human like beast spoke so close to her ear, she could feel the hot stinky breath on her face. Rin kicked and writhed futilely trying to shake the beast off her, but she could not, and, of course, she was being played with before eaten. . _"Why now? After being so close, Sesshoumaru-sama..."_ she shut her eyes and collected herself. Yes, she was going to die, and there was nothing anyone could do. With one hand Rin fumbled through the little cloth bag tied to her sash, her vision was clouding fast, it was getting harder and harder to breathe with the heavy Youkai on her. Her consciousness was quickly leaving her. A small smile formed on her lips when she found was she was looking for, her hand held the small mirror and clutched it tightly. It took all the little strength left in her to bring it out of the pouch and to her face. She looked at her hardly recognizable reflection, and winced as the claws began to tear her flesh, the blood tickled down her side. More and more Youkai were attracted by the smell of it, they gathered around and the one who held her captive. He bared his teeth at them in defiance, daring them to get his feast from him. Rin turned her attention back to the mirror and smiled weakly at her own reflection.

"_Goodbye Sesshoumaru-sama... I love you... I always have... and I always will."_

XXXX

Sesshoumaru stopped in mid flight, something went off in his head..._the mirror_... he thought. Quickly lifting a hand to his face he made the exact double of the mirror he had given Rin so long ago appear in front of him. In it he saw something he would give anything he owned not to have let happen. Rin lay on the ground almost to the point of death with a filthy shifter Youkai crouched on top of her. He could see her blood, her precious blood, as it left her body through the wounds that creature had inflicted on her.

"Take me to your other half!" he commanded to the magic mirror, _"...to my other half,"_ he whispered to himself. In less than an instant he was there, his sword cutting the monstrosity in half. Rin lay on the ground, unconscious and barely alive. He took her in his arms and carried her gently to a nearby tree, laying her on the ground under it, then turned to the other Youkai surrounding them, murder in his eyes.

"You've touched what is mine... now you pay with your lives," and he lunged himself at them. There seemed to be hundreds of them coming out of nowhere. Some tried to break the barrier he'd cast over Rin, but it was too late, because with one swing of his sword he killed them all.

Sesshoumaru came to Rin and put his ear to her heart. She was almost gone, he had revived her once and was not sure whether it Tenssega could bring the same soul back twice. Dammit, he should have tested it, he thought desperately. His cool was leaving him for the first time in years. If she died he didn't know what he would do. He couldn't wait for her to die and then try and revive her, because it may not work and that was a chance he was not willing to take.

"Rin" He whispered into her ear. Gods, why hadn't he protected her better? Why had he allow her so much freedom to get herself in these situations? Had she wanted to escape him? It did not matter to him. She belonged to him and he was never going to let her go. Her eyes fluttered open, looking but not seeing.

"Sesshoumaru...sama..." her voice little more than a gust of air leaving her mouth, "Am...I ... dead?" Another low whisper.

"Don't speak; I will take you somewhere safe." Sesshoumaru softly commanded, knowing he didn't have much time. Jaken was not here to tell him how to save her, and any medicine man or woman would take too long to reach, even if he flew as fast as the wind could carry him.

There was only one thing to do, but once done, this child he reared, woman he wanted, would truly be a part of him. He brought his wrist to his mouth, but then, looking at her pained face, changed his mind and brought his face to hers, his lips inches from hers.

"Rin," he whispered again, her eyes opened slowly, "open your mouth." Her brow knit into a little frown, but slowly parted her almost colorless lips. Sesshoumaru bit his own tongue and let the powerful Youkai blood gather before coming to her and releasing it into her open mouth. Rin's eyes shot open, recognition and realization hitting her. With his hand, he held her head so she wouldn't move away, and slowly came closer and closer until their lips were sealed into a kiss. His eyes never left hers, they stared at each other souls through their eyes. Her breathing became stronger, and her hands came up his head, one held on to the back of his head, the other played with his hair. How he'd wanted this, how he'd imagined it over the years. The blood was working its black magic, and he could see the color returning to her beautiful face. Rin got up, bringing them both to their knees. Sesshoumaru broke the kiss and stared into her dark eyes.

"Why did you leave?" he asked, his voice cold and reserved, but inside he feared the answer.

"I didn't leave, I would never leave you Sesshoumaru-sama, I, I just wanted to be like you, so you could love me." Her eyes were beginning to fill with tears; he didn't want to see her cry.

"Be like me?" he whispered.

"Youkai... if I became a Youkai, maybe, just maybe you would love me."

"Love you? There is no other being I have ever loved...but you." She was dead, it had to be, dead and gone to heaven, this could not possibly be real! It had to be a dream! Sesshoumaru-sama could not be here telling her that he loved her, "My love for you is both sacred and impure. I want your heart, but I want your body as well. Never has desire been so keen to me as it has been these past years. To lose your humanity it would be to lose what I love and desire about you the most. Forgive me for being such a proud fool! It almost cost me what I value most... **_you._**"

"Sesshoumaru...sama..." Rin trailed unable to utter words. Sesshoumaru stood and took her in his arms, his tail wrapping her like a warm blanket.

"Whether you want it or not, you are coming back, and even if I have to lock you in the castle, you shall stay with me." She was too dizzy to say anything. Sesshoumaru took to the air and together they flew back to the castle she called home.

X

They landed in her room. Rin felt dizzy, not from her wounds, but from the closeness to her love. If this was a dream she never wanted to wake up. Still in his arms he carried her to her bed and lay her down carefully, his hands were still on her body, he moved them over her belly through her clothes, but even then she could feel the heat in them.

"Rin...don't ever leave me again." His face was the same impassive cold countenance as always, but his eyes were so soft and full of emotion that it almost made her cry.

"I never thought of leaving you Sesshoumaru- sama." Tears were starting to form in her eyes, the thought that she had worried him made her so happy and sad at the same time

"Sesshoumaru...just Sesshoumaru..." As the soft whisper reached her, his lips descended on hers into a soft kiss, her body grew weak and her legs ceased to support her. They fell on her bed, his arms on either side of her supporting his weight. She opened her mouth to whisper his name, but he took this chance to intensify the kiss. Rin put her arms around his neck bringing him closer; they kissed for a long, long time, soft and fierce, hungry and tender. Then he left her lips causing her to whimper at the loss of him.

"Sesshoumaru..." She whispered and he looked into her eyes and smirked, then nipped her nose and kissed his way down her face, throat, and collarbone; one hand untying her kimono while the other caressed her face. And so he did what he'd dreamed of, desired more than life itself for a long time... had her... over and over.

X

Morning came, Sesshoumaru stared at her naked body and reflected on how long since he wanted to see it like this, ripe with pleasure, flushed by desire. He kissed the whole of her...his child, who was no longer a child, but the most exquisite woman... and she belonged to him. Soft moans from her fueled his passion again; the smell of her arousal woke the animal in him once more. He would never tire of this; never tire of loving her and showing her so. Slowly, Rin opened her eyes and smiled at him the way she'd done so many times and he'd failed to see for what it truly was... love. What he always seen as gratitude, was now out in the open revealing its true meaning. The animal he struggled to control came forth and he didn't care anymore, didn't have to hide it any longerthe need to be inside her was blinding him.

"I can die happy now," Rin whispered in his ear, slowly caressing his face, stroking his silver hair. A long smile spread across his satisfied features as he eased into her, his arms tightened around her. She kissed his face, his mouth whispering those three words he longed so much for so long to hear.

"You have the blood of a Youkai coursing through your veins, "Sesshoumaru responded softly, understanding his father and brother for the first time. He knew now that he would die protecting Rin, he had no more doubts, no regrets. "... You will not die in a long, long time."

X

... _**If your will is strong enough, your wishes will come true...**_

_**The End **_

XXXXX

_**Epilogue:**_

Arum descended right outside the small village. Rin hoped she was not too late and Sango had not left on her next journey. She walked the small distance to the first houses and was immediately welcomed with open arms. Sango was out hunting but should be back in time for supper. Rin sat with the other woman who brought her their best bread and tea, as if she was already part of their little happy family. They talked and laughed, Rin felt as if life had never been so good to her. She had told Sesshoumaru what they'd done for her and he agreed to take them into his protection. He had wanted to come and see these "people" as he called them for himself, but Rin opposed by telling him that they would not be ready for that yet. Reluctantly, Sesshoumaru allowed her to come with Aurum and a handful of servants to guard her. She knew, though, that he was somewhere around, ever vigilant as well. She looked into the sky and smiled at his invisible form.

"Rin, what are you doing here?" Sango came and hugged her instinctively checking her for wounds.

"I'm all right, I just came by to say thank you." Rin hugged her as well.

"I was so worried about you, Miroku and I went to the Miko cave and find hundredths of Youkai dead and mutilated. I was so afraid you'd gotten eaten."

"I told you I'd be alright," Rin smiled.

"You never said such things, but I'm glad that you are."

"I wanted to give you something, the whole town I mean." Sango looked at her confused. "I never told you the meaning of my journey because I didn't want to jinx it, but I can tell you now. I wanted to become a Youkai to be with the one I love... you see he is a Youkai and I thought if I became one he would... want to be with me." Sango stared at her, but said nothing, Rin continued, "I didn't become a Youkai, and I was about to die. Then he came and saved me."

"A Youkai saved you?" Sango spat in disbelief.

"No not a Youkai... Sesshoumaru."

"Sesshoumaru... Lord of the western lands?!" Sango exclaimed and the rest of the villagers just gasped. "Isn't he a Daiyoukai by now?"

"Yes." Rin responded in a small voice, "But he is not bad, I have lived with him since I was a child." Again, Sango couldn't hide her shock.

"And this is the Youkai you love?"

"More than life itself," Rin whispered.

"I am indebted to you," A deep voice said in time with the collective gasps the townspeople let out. Sango turned and her eyes went wide. There stood the tallest man she's even seen, with the longest silver hair, wearing the whitest Kimono and the finest armor..._this can't be **The** Sesshoumaru-sama_, she thought, "For helping Rin on her foolish quest," He continued looking around, he looked truly regal. Sango couldn't move, whether it was for fear or awe she couldn't tell. "Please accept as a token of my... our gratitude, my full protection of you and your village. I would be honored if you grant me this request." Rin came to him and put her arms around his waist, and he set a hand on her shoulder. Sango didn't have words to describe any of it. Miroku came closer.

"We didn't do anything we wouldn't have done for anybody else. We happen to like Rin-chan, and we appreciate your gratitude. That is enough to us."

"I respect that," Sesshoumaru said tonelessly. "Rin... shall we?" She smiled back at them and ran to Sango and put something in her hand, "Keep it with you always, look into it when you're in danger and I'll come to your rescue like you came to mine." Then she ran to the arms of the waiting Daiyoukai and they both disappeared into the air. Sango looked down to the object Rin had put in her hand and saw the finest mirror. She smiled knowing full well this would not be the last she saw of them.

End... for real this time 

Well hope you people liked it, this is my first try at Inuyasha, it is an AU so I wouldn't compare if I were you. Rin and Sesshoumaru's relationship is something that has always both puzzle me and fascinate me about the anime, I like them a lot better than the Obvious Inu/Kag pairing...Gomen that just my take. Thank you for giving this fic of mine a chance


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